“We Can’t Expect To Receive What We Are Unwilling To Give”
I remember in my younger (aka. single) years I used to love sending and receiving text messages from my friends. It was exciting, and to be quite honest, expected during major holidays - 4th of July, Christmas, Thanksgiving, New Years day, birthdays, etc. The thought that someone was thinking of you enough to send a text was super meaningful, and it physiologically fed the dopamine fix I sought.
As years past; however, those sought after messages started to dwindle down to just occasional yelps. Why was this happening? I used to get texts all the time. Matter of fact, I had to keep my cell phone constantly hooked on the charger because the notification alerts keep going off draining the battery (… well, not really, but you get the point, right?). It not only surprised me, but it was actually kind of unsettling. I mentioned this concern to one of my close friends, to which she asked, “Well have you been texting them at all?”
You know what? She was had a point … I did stop texting. I wasn’t intentionally giving my thumbs a workout anymore. I’ve become stagnant in my texting game and the results were showing. I totally didn’t realize that that was happening until she asked that question.
I bring this story up because it illustrates a concept that we can easily get away from, take advantage of, or forget to think of - it’s the closed-loop concept of giving. When we genuinely give something to someone (as simple as a text) or genuinely do something for someone (like opening up door), that gesture will eventually be reciprocated. It’s the Law of Reciprocity – when someone does something nice for you, you will have a deep-rooted psychological urge to do something nice in return.
Instead of talking about my petty excitement for texts, replace it with the value you bring to those that you serve. Is it the value of mentoring and teaching that you provide? Perhaps it’s the value from nurturing and spending time that you impart? Maybe it’s the value of healing and empowering that you communicate? Whatever it is, know that when you share value with other, you, in turn, also receive value in return. Keep everything to yourself as a self-absorbed blackhole and watch yourself raisin up all alone. Your hands will be so clenched tight from stopping things from getting out, that you miss the chance for opportunities and blessings to come in…
Change your mindset … Change your perspective … life is much better when you have an
outlook that creates opportunity.
Thanks for being curious and taking the time to read this! Hope it added value to your life and equips you to become better than you were yesterday!
Dr. Joe Jaime, DC, DACBSP®, ATC, CSCS®, FRC®ms, CES